B R O K E N P R I S M

A Cowboy's Ballad of Love, Loss, and Lies
or
Seifer Almasy and the Achy-Breaky Badonkadonk
Chapter One: The Job Requirements Do Not Include Fashion Sense (1/3)

Fandom: FFVIII
Characters: Seifer, Irvine, Zell, Fujin, Raijin
Rating: PG-13
Flags/Warnings: AU.

Summary: AU. Seifer is hired as a bodyguard for the rapidly-rising young country star Irvine Kinneas by his overprotective manager, Zell Dincht. The job's fraught with the dangers of screaming fans, unfortunate wardrobe choices, and actual conversations, but all Seifer really has to do is sit back and make sure no one (but him) punches Kinneas in the face.

For: bottle_of_shine. Nay has been waiting for this for something going on two years, which is really quite embarrassing.
Thanks: to lassarina, for idea bouncing and much-needed beta.

Public Disclaimer: I’m quite nervous about this, as it has seriously been built up for years and I fear nothing can ever equal the awesomeness that was and is the original idea.
Further Disclaimer: I'm expecting frothing discussion over which title to choose when I post the rest of this (and also for ff.net).

( Notes )

( Chapter One )

- - -

Stay tuned for Chapter Two, in which Seifer sends a series of terrible and profane postcards, Zell abuses muffins, Irvine actually wears a normal outfit, and chemistry rears its very unexpected head...

From the Mouths of Monsters (2)
Canon: FFIV / FFVIII Crossover
Rating: PG-13, for now
Characters: Quistis, Rydia, Kadowaki
Notes: This is complete crack. Take with grain of salt and sense of humor.

"What do you want me to do?" Squall asked finally, sliding the top piece of paper towards Quistis. "I have to sign off on whether or not I believe this woman could be a threat to Garden. And all I've got to go on so far are the two of you spouting things about how her magic feels."

( From the Mouths of Monsters )

Captains, I: The Meeting of the Ifrit and the Shiva
Fandom: FFVIII
Characters: Seifer, Quistis, Ensemble (this chapter: Raijin, Fujin, Xu)
"Warnings": THIS IS A PIRATE AU GUYS.
Rating: PG-13, language
Length: ~5000 words? omg.

For shanaqui, AU Meme.

( Notes )

Unbeta-ed. Self-edited and vomited onto your screen. The parrot idea was totally and shamelessly given to me by astrangerenters.

Enjoy and/or don't kill me.

( The Meeting of the Ifrit and the Shiva )